Sadie by Courtney Summers

“People don’t change. They just get better at hiding who they really are.”

TW: Sexual abuse, pedophilia, violence, drug abuse, death, murder, parental neglect

I wasn’t to sure what I was getting into when I started this book. All I knew was that the novel was half told in the format of a podcast, of a girl searching for her sister murderer. This is an extremely dark story. I highly recommend the audiobook, it is a full cast, I found the audio version added so much more enjoyment to the story.

This book tells the story of Sadie a 19 year old girl and her little sister Mattie. Sadie hasn’t had the easiest life, her mother is a drug addicted and she has taken on the role of caregiver for Mattie. So when Mattie was found dead, Sadie is determined to find the man who did

The narrative was so well done, split between two different timelines. The past is told through Sadie’s eyes as she pursues revenge. The current timeline is told through a podcast, a journalist investigating Mattie’s death and Sadie’s disappearance.

“It’s about the lengths we go to protect the ones we love … and the high price we pay when we can’t.”

Sadie is an amazing character, she speaks with a stutter, which only added to her character depth. She is tough but vulnerable and at times witty. She is also queer, I believe she is pansexual. Sadie felt really real to me, you could feel her pain and understand why she was hunting her sisters killer.

This was a really raw emotional and dark story. I’ve only read one other book by Summers, All the Rage, she does not shy away from hard topics. I really like reading dark contemporaries, I must like torture myself because I end up crying a lot. Summers does an amazing job of describing the trauma of sexual assault but not being to vivid.

The only thing I didn’t like about this book was the ending. It really leaves you hanging on what happened to Sadie in the end, there no conclusion to her story.

This book is very triggering as I’ve mentioned, but this is a story that will stay with me. I highly recommend this book, it’s such s hauntingly powerful book. It is definitely a book that lives up to the hype.

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